When your financial priorities don’t align and the division of labor seems unequal, married couples are often left at odds with one another. For one woman who opened up about how finances were impacting her marriage on Reddit’s “r/TrueOffMyChest” thread, this unequal division has left her questioning how to move forward with her husband.
The woman’s husband spends about 46% of her salary.
The couple has been married for two years now, however, the woman’s husband doesn’t have a job. The woman wrote, “He does not have a real job since we started as a couple but he loved playing games and selling some of his items and made a good business out of it.” RELATED: Woman’s Anger Over Ex-Husband’s New Partner ‘Stealing Her Retirement’ Sparks Debate However, since the Covid-19 pandemic happened, her husband’s business took a hit while the woman has maintained a job. But the woman doesn’t get paid a lot so when her husband took out a loan for a big bike, she felt financially burdened. “He got his money and made a down payment for 100,000Php [Phillipine Peso] for the bike. And now he got a loan for the remaining balance which needs to be paid in 1 year. 13,000Php needs to be paid on his bike, and that’s about 46% of my salary,” the woman explained. For context, 100,000Php is about $1750 USD. While the woman understood that her husband would need her to financially support him, this was still too much for her to handle. She has been paying off her husband’s loans for almost a year and it will end in 2 months. However, she is concerned about whether this would happen again. RELATED: Man Learns Girlfriend Kept Large Inheritance A Secret While Making Him Pay More Rent “He did not even look for a job to pay for it, he just let me do it. I feel that I am being robbed, and manipulated,” the woman added. Additionally, he continues to play video games all day. This behavior from the woman’s husband made her a little angry at him.
Redditors have started a debate about who’s in the wrong here.
There were many people who outright stated that the man was wrong for taking out a loan when he was unemployed. One user wrote, “He took out a loan without having a job? That’s next-level stupidity. Why should you pay for his poor decisions? Tell the guy to get a grip, grow up and get a job.” Another user wrote, “No partner should be relying on their SO to pay their way through life unless it has been agreed upon first. This obviously isn’t your case.” However, some people saw that the woman was being unfair to her husband and this situation would’ve been alright had the roles been reversed. One person commented, “You’re married. Your money is his money and vice versa. He’s kind of like a stay-at-home husband. Can you imagine if a man complained about this?” Another user commented, “When it’s a female making the money it’s ‘my money’ when it’s a guy making the money it’s ‘our money.’" Additionally, some people stated that while spouses share money, the woman should watch out so her husband doesn’t spend a fortune on unnecessary things. One person wrote, “When you are married, the money should never be ‘mine’ and ‘yours.’ You share money. With that said, you need to hold your spouse accountable so that they do [not] just spend a bunch of money on frivolous things.” RELATED: Dad Calls CPS On Ex-Wife After His Kids Came Home With Old Clothes, Sparking Debate Sanika Nalgirkar is a News & Entertainment Writer based in India. She has a master’s degree in Creative Writing. See more of her writing on her website.