When there’s a true magnetic attraction between two people, the chemistry is so natural, often the very first time the two of you meet. While mutual attraction is essentially when you and another person both are attracted to each other physically and emotionally, unspoken attraction is when there is no need to tell each other that you are attracted to them. As you’re likely aware, the two often overlap. According to dating coach Ronnie Ann Ryan, there is an innate ability to sense this kind of attraction because, biologically, “it ensures the survival of the species and drives the urge for a sexual encounter. In ancient times, this kept the population growing.” RELATED: 7 Factors That Create Instant Attraction To Some People — But Not Others It’s only natural to want to know if there’s going to be that magnetic, mutual attraction between you and the person you’re interested in. If you’re paying attention to the verbal and physical cues, you can much more easily get a better sense of whether the two of you click, versus when you’re just texting each other or using an app alone.
9 Clear signs of mutual attraction between two people
1. Conversation flows easily, and you’re both genuinely interested in learning about the other person.
If the conversation isn’t one-sided and you aren’t the only person asking the questions, this is a good sign your date is mutually attracted to you. According to experts, reciprocity in relationships is valuable in intimate relationships. If they are attracted to you, they will want to know more about you and ask you questions. To test this sign of mutual attraction, try to notice how many times you ask questions vs. them and if the conversation seems to flow naturally. If the conversation seems even, that’s a good sign. It’s also a major plus when there aren’t a bunch of awkward, uncomfortable silences that are painful to slog through!
2. You can’t stop looking into each other’s eyes.
“You can sense mutual attraction by the way someone looks at you,” says Ryan. Mutual attraction is all about sexual chemistry, which is often marked, at least initially, by prolonged eye contact. “You can feel that magnetism without saying a single word,” Ryan explains. “It feels like electricity that jumps between you as you touch, or even look longingly at each other.” The two of you might look at each other, then away and then back — and as you start getting more comfortable with each other the eye contact, is even more intense. If someone is attracted to you, they will keep their gaze on you, whether they realize it or not, so make sure to notice if there’s a lot of warm, intimate eye contact during conversation.
3. You’re naturally attracted to the scent of one other.
There’s something about a person’s scent that can make us even more attracted to them. This is, in large part, thanks to pheromones, which are like chemical messages that our bodies give off that give us a certain scent. You can spot this if he or she points out that you smell nice or if they aren’t afraid to get closer to you because you smell good to them. See if you catch them trying to casually get a whiff of your neck when you happen to be close to each other, or if he or she points out that they like the way your perfume or cologne smells (even if you didn’t put on any before leaving the house).
4. Your body language is having a conversation entirely about each other.
Body language is crucial when decoding unspoken, magnetic attraction between two people. If a mutual connection is there, both people typically consciously or subconsciously use open body language, such as angling their body towards the other person, facing their feet toward you, or casually brushing up against you or lightly touching your arm (perhaps with a polite “excuse me”) when passing by. They may also be more obvious by smiling, especially with their eyes, or waving ‘hi’ discreetly.
5. You cozy up to each other when you’re on a date.
While we made previous mention of this in the last point, this has to do with when you’re in a situation where you’re actually physically close to each other, like being out on a first date. A major sign of unspoken mutual attraction between two people is cozying up to one another, despite already being in close proximity. Another way of engaging in physical touch might include giving one another a slight touch on the arm, back, shoulder, or leg. Men frequently do this on dates to “test out” how things are going, and to say if their date will brush away their hand. If not, they’ll assume things are going well, and the sexual electricity they sense is indeed mutual. RELATED: 5 Signs Your Relationship Is All Chemistry — And Not Enough Love Or Connection
6. You’re having a blast and your body wants to send a signal to your date, too, so you can’t stop smiling at each other.
A good sign of unspoken attraction is when the two of you can’t stop smiling when looking at each other, simply because you’re both so attracted to one another and having a good time. Smiling is also an indicator someone is sending to the other person that they’re enjoying his or her company and the person their actual date themselves, too!
7. They do what’s called “mirroring” while you’re both talking.
According to studies, the number one sign of unspoken mutual attraction is mimicking behaviors such as mirroring the other person’s posture, initiating conversation, making constant eye contact, nodding, smiling, and laughing at whatever the other person is saying. For example, you might notice your date takes a sip of their drink at the same time you do, or touches their hair whenever you do. If these mirroring behaviors and gestures are reciprocated then that’s a good sign of mutual attraction. Make sure to match their moves if you want to give them hints you like them.
8. You check each other out.
There’s nothing that spells out mutual attraction and clearly states ‘I’m really into you’ than obviously checking out the other person. This is an undeniable rule of attraction because if a person can’t help but eye you up and down, that means they’re not just attracted to your face, but your whole body. Make sure to pay attention out of the corner of your eye when you get up from the table, in case your date’s eyes glance over at your body to check you out.
9. You can’t stop laughing, no matter how lame your jokes are (and theirs, too).
If you are having a conversation with a date and it’s going really well, you might find yourself laughing at pretty much anything, and your date doing the same. Laughing, including small giggles, smiles, and even big, hearty laughs is definitely a major sign of mutual attraction. Be careful not to confuse mutual attraction with relationship compatibility. “Today sexual chemistry with someone is a heck of a lot of fun. But this type of magnetic draw rarely turns into a long-term relationship or lasting love,” warns Ryan. “It’s hot, it’s sexy, it’s all-consuming. But it’s not a sign of compatibility beyond the bedroom or the ability to commit to lasting love and a supportive, enduring relationship.” However, that shouldn’t deter you from exploring mutual attraction. “If you decide to check it out, just be sure you know your agenda before you get started, so you don’t end up disappointed or broken-hearted,” Ryan says. RELATED: 7 Secret Laws Of Attraction That Are Extremely Powerful Megan Hatch is a writer at YourTango who covers news and entertainment, love and relationships, and internet culture. Follow her on Twitter and on Instagram.
